Recently in Public Category

Why I should stop blogging and why my posts are utterly boring.

It's becoming painfully clear that I haven't been expressing myself the way I want to when it comes to writing down my thoughts here. Where's that entry about my fuming frustration? Or the one about me crying in the night? Nope, I can hardly find an entry that truely relates to my innermost thoughts and feelings.

[ Ok, except for the ones which contained my gripes of not being able to find a vintage lefty Fender Jaguar. Well, I couldn't help it when such recurring frustration happens...like this morning when I saw this on ebay AGAIN. Darn. It's sad when you have that $3.4K to spare but you're a lefty.]

And to think that my current entries already earned me an 'emo' tag from my band members. Ugh.

Oh...which reminds me...who else reads what I write here? Other than providing free entertainment an insight of my life to my band members, I doubt anyone else really gives a damn, isn't it?

Also, gone are the days of posting snapshots of my life. [What life?] You'd never find group photos of me having fun with pals or some happening chalet photos here. No ex-school reunion pics showing chio bus demure ex-classmates or chillout pics of beautiful people in my social circle. [What chillout? My social circle's as huge as a hula hoop] Instead, you'll only see recycled stashes of boring high-energy gig photos and more often than not, narcissistically obscene...err I mean, artistically self-taken, heavily photoshopped pictures of me, myself and I.

...which isn't a bad thing if they were half as pleasant as hers with twirlies. Unfortunately, you'll have to get your own puke bags when viewing mine. Plus, I'm tired of photoshopping all the zits and scar marks off my face and applying 'smart blur' to tame my Mars-like complexion to look more like the moon surface.

Maybe it's because I don't readily provide links to interesting blogs/stuff I read, nor do I make personalised reference to them...like how I kept mum about this blog I could very much identify with.

Also, I can't write controversial or provocative stuff. It's easy to stir up some commotion or raise eyebrows with ladies writing about the finer details of sensitive issues like menstruation, etc (which just triggered a thought...why 'men' in front of the spelling? Hmm...) or guys writing about how they got laid, etc...which, none of that happens to me. All the self-censorship and selective filtering of content means that I can't even write about this weird, and erm...'crude' dream I had two nights ago of someone I know.

If only I'm good looking and hunky, I don't mind being categorised as a 'Himbo' for spewing out shallow posts. But the fact that I don't read these days [and that my favourite book has been Bram Stoker's 'Dracula' considering that the only other books I've recalled reading (and forgetting) are Stephen R. Covey's 'Seven Habits Of Highly Effective People' and Alan Pease's 'Body Language'] means that I'm way out of touch in the intellectual department. So don't ask me about Leonardo De Caprio Code...urm, I meant Da Vinci's Code or some John Grisham thrillers.

::Interuption::

Just got back from attending to a student at the counter. Deja vu. Yes. She's the second female student who broke down in front of me. Just great. In fact, a couple of days earlier, a student whom I was talking to on the phone regarding some issues sounded a little nasal and I don't think she was having flu.

I wished I was breaking hearts like a cassanova instead, but I was merely conveying messages to them! It's pretty hard to keep a poker-face when dealing with such situations. And as my lady supervisor put it 'That works on guys'... still, it doesn't feel good to see someone in tears even if it's meant to get around things.

Ok, back to the main topic.

This blog lacks everything. No humour, no eye-candy, no links to gorgeous bloggers, no free videos/mp3s for downloading (unless you wanna hear my croaking), no intelligent info, no cheap thrill, no changes in layout, hardly any updates, no 'hi, I'm a 26-year old guy who...' kinda introductions, no friendster profile listing, no msn email, no email address, sucky comments system, but most of all....

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You dig that, right? I've proven another point: No suspense or surprises. Oh wait. There is one. Frankly, how many out there actually know (ok, LGFers don't count) there is a secret link to a gallery of gorgeous shapely babes in the buff and some threesome pics?

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...you're back from all that clicking and searching? *lol*

ok, so I lied.

*looking at watch now* Geez...I started this entry from the morning. And now I'm still writing it. Oh, lemme add another point: It's draining and distracting to write blog entries this long.

I think my Xbox is calling me...Fifa 2005 anyone? Hmm...since when have I started playing sports games?! I think something's terribly wrong...

Adieus!

*Updated*

I can't remember how many times I changed my hairstyle but here's the current one:

I was going for a similar style on the left. Colour-wise, I bleached and dyed blue for the highlights...not very visible from the pics though. However, the blue is fading real soon despite been only a week after I did it :/

Alot of times, I conveniently ended up taking shirtless pics of myself after haircuts before my shower...hahaha! The good thing about an unpopular blog like mine means that I don't need to give a damn about 'exposing' myself *lol*

Anyway, here they are (click to view. Puke bags not provided):

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Thanks for voting!

After looking at the results, I guess I get to stay huh? Hahahh...it's surprising though, that there are only 11 votes in total, yet I get close to a hundred hits a day. Hmm...maybe there are really only 11 readers out there while most of the hits are from those annoying bots, drug companies, online casinos and what-nots? *ugh! pathetic*

Nevertheless, it's comforting to know that not every Tom, Dick and Harry reads what I'm writing and I don't need to live up to any expectations, obligations or get bothered by just how many peeps get to see my topless pics *lol*

Today is a good day. I think. The past few days have been quite amazing to me.

I snipped off my long hair over the weekend. Utterly short now. It used to be hanging down. Now it's gravity-defying. Back to clay and air fix hair spray. It'll be back to the period where any guys with hair longer than me will draw my attention and induce certain amount of jealousy in me *lol* Pictures will come later.

It's a luxury not to work on Mondays. Everyone in the Department attended a workshop on teamwork and stuff instead...you know...those kind with games and tasks that require trust, teamwork, etc with one another.

It was fun and somehow, the kid in everyone of us ran amok yesterday while we took on challenges and obstacles, laughing and fooling around. Even the elder ones were really sporting.

Oh, did I mention that I get to hug a pretty and voluputuous lady? *lol* I was partnered with this distant colleague of mine and we had to burst a balloon between us by hugging each other really tightly :P

Ok, not to sound perverted or something, but hugs are something really distant to me. Even my parents don't do that when I was young. Nor friends (except Jole). Strangely, it reminded me of all the previous hugs I've had. Yes, it's so few that I could actually count them. And they were all tagged with significant events: One marked the end of a potential relationship while two came from Jole for her birthday and farewell (her transfer to NTU). Yeah, yeah, I'm the 'deprived' type who belongs to the 'NBK' group...'Never-Been-Kissed' category of people who hasn't been in a relationship nor experienced the joys of dating (Read more about it here). So, to hold someone really close and tightly gives me a preview of the warmth and assurance hugs bring :)

Ok, enough about hugging or I'd start sounding like a wacko *lol*

It's been a long while since I've done anything for anyone. So, recently I wrote a song for someone. I kinda miss this feeling of penning songs and strumming with my guitar without a care in the world (it's a different feeling from composing in a band)

...and two nights' ago, it's the first time I received an sms from that very same person while last night's the first time hearing that voice, and carrying a conversation into the night.

Funnily, it's not the first time a lady sings to me on the phone though *lol*

Talking about singing, I'm looking forward to my band's upcoming gig(s). It's been a while since we've graced any stage. And with new songs, new equipment and psyched attitude, I can't wait to explode on stage.

I'll be taking a much-awaited break to go Thailand at the end of the month too (hope my passport thingy won't run into any problem!)...so, that's another hightlight for the moment.

Looking back, I'm glad that my life's gears finally got cranking again. On the journey of life, it's not going in a wrong direction that scares me as long as there are other roads to take. What's scary is not being able to move at all...or to move in circles on the same paths.

Hmm...I'm back to my long-windedness...hahhah...Bet you regret voting for me now huh? *lol*

I might have found the reason to why I engage myself in blogging or blog-reading. Not that I never knew why before, I just felt I could relate to it better after stumbling upon a particular blog just a moment ago. Sure, the usual stuff are there, pictures and all, but it's her content that draws reminiscence of my experiences and feelings back to me. Sometimes, it's through looking at others, that we realise what's really inside ourselves. While they're blogging their emotional journey, it's like they're writing our life's stories. It's all about reflection. Just like how we can relate to songs, movies, literature...for everyone feeds of one another in a desperate attempt to express what's inside us.

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Sometimes it's hard to keep certain emotions away. Just like a few of days ago, onboard a bus on a journey home from work, I encountered this young loving couple sitting in front of me engaging in bouts of harmless and mischievous hitting and teasing of each other. The girlfriend whacked her guy and he would schemingly yelled in pain and feeling guilty, she'd massage his 'aching' spots...and moments later, they'd cuddle up, whisper sweet nothings and she'd bury her head onto his shoulder...ahhh...the games lovers play...

Sigh. Scenes like these immediately catapult me back to the familiar lonely corner of my heart. I would have smiled at the wonders of love and carry a bright outlook on the situation, but that would be tough to fake and it'd only make the suppressed sadness harder to stomach.

Yes, I yearn for love. I yearn for the feelings...for a relationship...for all the silly little games they play...I even yearn for the responsibilities, the hardships, the challenges, and the risks of even more heartbreak. I have to start and learn somewhere. Call me a desperado if you'd like, I don't care. You won't understand unless you've gone through my life and being me. And for the record, I've never been in a relationship, so cut me some slack, will ya? *lol*

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Somewhere only we know - Keane

This could be the end of everything
So why don't we go somewhere only we know?
Somewhere only we know
Somewhere only we know

It was an eventful Saturday for me this week. Firstly, jamming was quite fulfilling as we tried out our new song with vocals for the first time. Though it's still pretty raw, I already like what I'm hearing so far ;)

After jamming, I had to rush back and head for the celebration of my brother's first baby son (my nephew) reaching 1 month old (what do you call that in English?) Well, a picture tells a thousand words, so here goes:

My bro booked a few tables at the Coffee Lounge in Goodwood Park Hotel to invite some good friends and close relatives...

There were lots of kids and toddlers there too...considering the fact that my mum's side of the family has 3 generations :) By the way, the folks were 'checking out' my cousin's 3-month old son (kids are in the limelight during family gatherings *lol*

Lotsa relatives came...and it's really nice catching up with them and finding out about what they're doing now, after a long period of absence.

Here they are, my bro and his ultra cute 1-month old son!

A closer look at the father and son :)

My nephew, Osher! Look at how he pout his tiny lips and making face at us!! Isn't he such a lovely cute little babe? :)

Ahh...doe-y eyes and yearning for attention (and a cuddle).

..in my mum's arms right now...feeling all comfy :)

It's food time! :P Nice touch to the honey-flavoured jelly with assorted fruit cubes. At first glance, I thought it was fruits in alcohol! *lol*

Dessert: Movenpick chocolate ice cream and some delicious cheesecake (I think)

Haiz...the only pics of me for the night. I was doing mostly the shooting, until my young cousins decided to play with my camera and took candid snap shots of me! *lol* And yes, my hair was still the topic of the day as always whenever my relatives talk to me...hahah...but at least they know I'm playing music and in a band after numerous family gatherings..hahha!

Mum and grandson in her arms. Her first grandson :) That explains the smile on her face :)

That's it...the night was wrapped up after a hearty buffer dinner as everyone makes way for their transport...

I think my mum's gonna miss Osher since she's been staying over at my brother's place to look after him for 1 month...Well, we'll have to make do with seeing them perhaps once a week now ^__~